It’s crazy though because this topic hits really close to home for me because quite honestly, and I’ve said this in a few other videos, but I don’t have a huge social circle. Especially right now with all the lock-downs and the fact that I work long hours. The crazy part is, I’m a pretty social person and all of the forced isolation has been difficult to deal with. So in an effort to help you and also help myself, I came up with a ton of different ways you can not only be more social, but also make some new friends. I’ve got a lot to cover in this post, so I hope you’ll stick around to the end.
You’re not alone
The very first thing I want to say is that millions of people are out there looking for the same exact thing you’re looking for. So don’t let the fact that you’re 40, or 50, or any sort of stigma that you think is attached to your age , don’t let that stop you. Because I can tell you right now you are not alone. Human beings are social by nature. Most all of us crave some type of social interaction especially with people who share similar interests.
Check out MeetUp
Go check out meetup.com And find some groups with similar interests to yours. Are you into photography? Music, or wine? There’s tons of groups on meetup that you can be apart of with no strings attached. Maybe you’ve got a specific dog breed like a Great Dane. Find a Great Dane owners club and join it and start being active. They probably have weekly dog walks or monthly dog park meetups where you can go meet other Dane owners and talk about your dogs. If you’re into photography for example, you can join a photo group and go do some photowalks in your town. I did that years ago with a Seattle group and the possibilities are endless.
Connect with old friends
Try reconnecting with old friends. I know in my case, there’s a lot of guys that I simply lost track of. But honestly, it would only take a phone call or a text to reach back out and reconnect. Is too easy to lean on the excuse of being too busy with work as the reason you guys lost touch. You guys were friends once before, so there’s no reason you can’t reconnect and share what’s been going on in each other’s lives for the past couple years.
Say Hi to strangers
Next is a big one, and it’s not being afraid to engage strangers. Say hi to strangers. Compliment strangers and be open to new people. Don’t be closed off and don’t walk around with your head down looking grumpy. Look at people and smile and say hello. I have absolutely no problem engaging random strangers at the grocery store or in line somewhere at the mall. So, for example, and this is kind of funny, just the other day I was in line at the grocery store getting some vitamins. There was one guy that was doing the bagging and there was another guy handling the register. As I was getting closer, I overheard the guy working the register say something to the other guy about trying to be employee of the month. When I got up to the front and was being checked out, the Bag guy ask the register guy, “What do you get for being employee of the month?” The guy on the register paused for just a second, so of course I had to open my big mouth and say, “What are you asking him for, he’s never been the employee of the month.” It was actually pretty hilarious and they both started cracking up as well as about seven or eight other people around me that heard me say that. Of course I told him I was just messing around, but my point is, don’t be afraid to engage strangers and break the ice.
Make an effort with your appearance
I’ve got a lot more to go, but just circling back for a minute on being open to new people and not looking closed off. When you’re out in public, make just a small effort in your appearance. It’s easy just to go from sitting on the couch in your sweatpants to running off to the grocery store really quick. But honestly, how hard is it to throw on a nice pair of jeans, a nice pair of boots and a jacket before heading out the door. When you look presentable, you’re more approachable. The simple fact is, that humans are attracted to what pleases their eye. So when you dress in a way that looks nice to people, you’re attracting them to you. I’m not saying you have to go out and wear a suit and tie everywhere, because honestly that’s not very realistic and it’s probably way too much. All I’m saying is to just make an effort before walking out the door.
Use skin care
Another part of looking more presentable, is making sure you’ve got a good skin care regimen so your face always looks healthy and refreshed. Look, the simple fact is this, the older we get, the more wrinkles we’re going to have. But the sooner you start doing something to help the skin on your face, the better off you’ll be and the better your face will look. That’s where today’s sponsor Tiege Hanley comes in.
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Listen, I’m doing everything I can to help fight off wrinkles and look the best I can for as long as I can and there’s not a damn thing wrong with that. So if you’re anything like me, or if you’re currently not doing anything right now to help protect and improve the skin on your face… do something about it. Tiege Hanley is giving this audience a great offer. You just gotta click our special link and go take a look. You’ve gotta give it a try because like I said, I’ve been spending my own money it for the last four years, and I believe it’s worth your time.
Connect with younger people
Next is try connecting with people you normally wouldn’t , like people younger than you. Truth be told, most of my social circle is full of people younger than me. It’s a great way to stay informed of what’s relevant right now and a great way to stay in touch with what’s current and what younger people are like today. I get a lot of energy from hanging out with younger people and honestly, it’s a win win for both of us. I’ve had some crazy times with some of my younger friends, and I can tell you right now, young people today are a lot different then we were, or at least than I was back then.
Say YES to opportunities
If I’ve said this once I’ve said it 1000 times. Say YES to new opportunities. If somebody invites you somewhere, GO! Don’t make excuses why you can’t. Don’t feel like you’re an inconvenience. And don’t be afraid of trying new things and stepping outside of your comfort zone from time to time. I’m sure I’m not the first one to tell you that the best parts of life happen outside of your comfort zone. And on the other side of that coin, if you know somebody is going somewhere, or doing something, ask if you can tag along. Chances are, they’ll say absolutely! I wanted to ask you, but didn’t think you would be interested. You never know who you might meet or what amazing things might happen that day.
Friends of friends
Another one is reach out to friends of friends that you’ve met before. If you’ve been at a dinner party or a function and had nice conversations with people that are friends of friends, there’s no reason why you can’t reach out to those people and invite them out for drinks or over for game night or something. The best part is, they’re not strangers. You’ve met them before and you have social proof and validation because the people you’re friends with, they’re friends with as well so you automatically have something in common with them.
Eat at the bar
If you’re alone, once things start opening back up again, go out to a restaurant and sit at the bar. Grab some appetizers And chat up the servers. Grab a beer or two and watch the game or something. Most people who sit at the bar want to talk to people , especially if they’re by themselves. It doesn’t have to be cheesy or anything, but just general casual conversations about current events, travel or even sports.
Travel by yourself
Speaking of travel, if you’re by yourself, travel by yourself. It doesn’t even have to be anywhere fancy or far away. You can jump in your car and drive 3-4 hours to somewhere you’ve never been and stay in a nice Air B&B for a couple nights. Go explore that town. Check out the local arts scene and restaurants. If it’s a tourist town, chances are most everybody there is from somewhere else. So once again, you automatically have something in common with the people around you because you all came to the same place from somewhere else. Tell people you’re just staying there for a couple days and you’ve never been before. Ask for some of the things you need to see while you’re in town.
Join or start a dinner club
Join a dinner club or start one yourself. You’ve probably heard me talk about this before, but before Covid happened, I wanted to host a big White Party. I’m hoping I’m still able to do that at some point, but being the host of an event is a great way to make new friends because everybody wants to talk to you and thank you for hosting a great event. Friends can bring other friends and you’ll be introduced to a lot of new people that you have something in common with.
If things are starting to open up where you are, start taking some tours. Take a tour of local distillery or a manufacturing plant or a winery, or a museum. Most of the time it’s free and all the people that will be in the tour group will have similar interests. You’ve gotta take some initiative for yourself and get outside. Start taking regular walks around your neighborhood and you’ll start meeting the neighbors. Maybe someone’s got a classic car in the garage and you can strike up a conversation about that. If you’re a golfer, join the Men’s club at a local golf course and start playing the weekly tournaments and meet all the members. There’s a lot of socializing that happens after the round.
You’re in control of your life
It’s easy to feel sad and lonely especially if you’re by yourself. But you know as well as I do that you cannot let that sink in and take over your life. You’re in control of your life. You’re in control of your ability to take care of yourself and be open to other people. If you like this topic and want me to continue making posts similar to this, please let me know.