Everybody has insecurities
So right out of the gate, having insecurities is normal. Everybody has insecurities, even the people you might think are living perfect lives. Or the people that have been blessed with the DNA that makes them super good-looking. Or the people with loads of money. We all have insecurities, but we also, all have choices. What’s most important, is how we deal with our insecurities. We can either let it consume us and allow it to completely take over who we are, or we can get to work on fixing it.
The other option is to accept who you are and not let your insecurities get the best of you. Because like I said, you’re an amazing human. However, I can’t just end the video there. So let’s go over a few of the most common insecurities that men face.
Male pattern balding
Let’s start with a big one, hair loss and male pattern baldness. Now, obviously, I’m not gonna sit here and pretend to know what that’s like or how it feels to have your hair fall out. This is part of my DNA and I didn’t do anything, or not do anything to still have my hair. And neither did you. If you’re loosing your hair or if you already lost it, you didn’t do anything to cause it. You can’t blame yourself so stop beating yourself up about it. You have two options; Get a hair transplant, it buzz it off and accept it. Do this, go ask 50 women if they think hair is a critical component when looking for a man in our age bracket. The overwhelming majority will say no. Nobody else really cares.
Rejection
Let’s talk about the insecurity of rejection, and more specifically, being rejected by women. Now, if you’re married or in a committed relationship, I applaud you, that’s awesome. But, for my single friends out there who want to be in a relationship, this one’s for you. Okay, I get it. Meeting women (or men, whatever you’re in to, it doesn’t bother me) can be intimidating. The eye contact, the approach, what do I say? Does my breath stink? Is this jacket okay? Maybe I should’ve worn my other brown shoes. Will they even like me?
All of this self doubt can absolutely cripple a guy. So my advice is simple and it’s a little tough love. If you want to go talk to her, go talk to her. If you don’t, don’t. But don’t let your own insecurity make decisions for you based on fear. Here’s your options; you can go be uncomfortable a few times as you face your insecurity, or you can live with the regret of not taking action. Here’s the thing, you didn’t know her 5 minutes ago, so if you talk to her for a few minutes and it doesn’t work out, you weren’t talking to her before that so it doesn’t even matter. That doesn’t change who you are, and it doesn’t change your value as an amazing human.
Looking older
Next is getting wrinkles and looking older. It’s crazy. I’m not sure when it happens, but one day you look in the mirror and go; “what the flip….? When did I get so old”? Or you see yourself in a photo and realize you have more lines on your face that you thought you did. That’s why Tiege Hanley agreed to help sponsor this article. Personally, I’m not insanely over the top crazy about skin care, but I do use Tiege Hanley skin care products every single day. I’ve been spending my own money on it for about the last 4 years or so. And at 51, you might disagree, but I don’t think I’m not doing too bad.
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Performance in the bedroom
Okay, here’s another big insecurity for a lot of men, and it’s performance in the bedroom. That might mean your insecure about your penis size, premature ejaculation or not being able to get an erection or get fully erect. ED is something that affects a huge number of men even in their 30’s. If you’re struggling with erections, go talk to your doctor. If that makes you uncomfortable, there’s companies that offer assistance on line so you can get treatments delivered right to your mailbox without having to go see anyone face to face. There’s really no excuse at this point.
Let me just say this, if you’re single and you currently watch a lot of porn, I might suggest cutting back a bit. Now, I’m not against porn, but if that’s what you’re basing your future sexual experiences off of, that’s not reality my friend. Sex is not a wrestling match and it’s not abusive (unless you’re both into that sort of thing. I don’t judge). Just because you saw it in a video, that does not mean that represents all women. Now, back to reality. If you’re struggling with premature ejaculation, first of all, it’s normal. Guys will almost always get there before a woman. But there’s plenty of ways you can prolong your experience in bed, and not all of it involves penetration.
Communicate with her, tell her she’s incredibly sexy and beautiful and smells amazing and she’s driving you fricking crazy. That’s flattering to her. She wants to feel beautiful, and she wants to hear that you’re into her and that she’s driving you crazy. If she talked to YOU that way you’d be totally into it. Am I right? If you’re getting to that point, stop slowly and go back to her and pay attention to pleasing her more. Just don’t be abrupt about stopping and switching gears because it can be a little jarring if you stop all of the sudden. Switching things up is fine, just try to make the transition smooth. Like I said, there’s a lot you can do to keep things going.
Body image
Body image. As we get older, or bodies don’t look as good as they once did, even if you hit the gym every day. You might look great for your age, but in your mind, you still might compare yourself to the 25 year old version that you remember. Maybe, like me, you don’t hit the gym as much as you should. This is a big one for me. I struggle with body image. I feel like there’s a lot of pressure on me to look a certain way in order to have and maintain credibility with you guys. Nobody’s perfect. I could do more and I could improve. But I’m not going to let it consume me to the point that I stop showing up here for you guys. Today… Right now…. This is who I am.
Finances and retirement
Let me wrap things up with this last one, and it’s finances and retirement. Again, a biggie for me. You guys know my story, you know I’m not a wealthy guy. I think about the future and visualize where I want to be in a few years. I’m working towards it and I want that for you too. Just because you don’t have a ton of dough in savings, doesn’t mean you’re a bad guy. It doesn’t even mean you’re bad with money. It just means this is where you are. You can either let stress and insecurity take you over, or you can work towards getting in better financial shape. And that’s going to be different for each individual. Live well my friends, and I’ll see you soon.
